train-for-space-underwater — ES complete
Source (EN)
- Title
- How to train for space when you already live underwater
- Summary
- Neutral buoyancy comes naturally to some of us.
- Slug
- train-for-space-underwater
NASA trains astronauts in swimming pools.
We were born in the pool. Advantage: Sardine Aerospace.
The programme
Our syllabus is short, because evolution did most of it:
- Neutral buoyancy: pre-installed.
- Life support drills: gills, redundant, twice.
- Confined quarters: we sleep four hundred to a tin, voluntarily.
The hard part is the opposite of the usual: our crew must train for dryness. Phase one is a damp towel. Phase two is a photograph of a beach. Phase three, which only the Commander has passed, is standing near a radiator.
Graduation is a lap of the harbour in formation, followed by absolutely no fish jokes at dinner, by order.
Translation preview
Hay agencias que entrenan astronautas en piscinas.
Nosotros nacimos en la piscina. Ventaja: Sardine Aerospace.
El programa
Nuestro temario es corto, porque la evolución hizo casi todo:
- Flotabilidad neutra: de serie.
- Simulacros de soporte vital: branquias, redundantes, por partida doble.
- Espacios confinados: dormimos cuatrocientos por lata, voluntariamente.
Lo difícil es lo contrario de lo habitual: la tripulación entrena la sequedad. La fase uno es una toalla húmeda. La fase dos, la foto de una playa. La fase tres, que solo la Comandante ha superado, es acercarse a un radiador.
La graduación es una vuelta al puerto en formación, seguida de absolutamente ningún chiste de peces en la cena, por orden.